Ex-Blizzard Employee Divorces Husband Over WoW
By Stephany on Saturday, February 16th, 2008 at 1:33 PM PST In Blizzard, Computer, Game Companies, Game Platforms, Gamer Life, Games, World of Warcraft
A California resident who once worked briefly for Blizzard has recently divorced her husband of six years because according to her, his addiction to World of Warcraft ruined their marriage. Never having played the game herself, 28 year-old Jocelyn stated that her husband Peter’s crippling addiction to the game became more than she could handle.
“He would get home from work at 6:00, start playing at 6:30, and he’d play until three a.m. Weekends were worse — it was from morning straight through until the middle of the night. It took away all of our time that we spent together. I ceased to exist in his life.”
Having been friends with Peter since the age of 13 and married for six years, it only took a paltry nine months for the marriage to collapse after receiving the game as a gift from her.
“I bought the game for him for Christmas 2004, when it first came out. By May we had our first serious discussion about where our marriage was going, and by September I had moved out.”
Having had many discussions on the fact that WoW had taken over Peter’s life, Jocelyn tried to intervene and schedule “together” time with him – to no avail. On one such occasion, she had set aside 30 minutes to watch a favorite TV show together, but he refused because he was in the middle of a raid and could not understand why she was upset that he stood her up. Eventually, Peter’s domestic duties also began to suffer for the game as he stopped paying bills and refused to do his share of the housework.
Although a gamer herself Jocelyn has never played WoW because she recognized the fact that it was a game that would never end and therefore did not wish to play it. She also states that WoW was the sole catalyst for the divorce and is still highly emotional about its impact on her marriage.
“I’m real, and you’re giving me up for a fantasy land. You’re destroying your life, your six-year marriage, and you’re giving it up for something that isn’t even real. [Blizzard] build it in such a way that you have to keep putting more and more time into it to maintain your status. I remember thinking when I was married that it was downright exploitative to people who couldn’t control themselves in that way. It’s set up like a drug.”
Because of the emotional scars of the divorce and the reasons surrounding it, Jocelyn has stated that next time around, she will stay clear of gamers.
While this is indeed sad news for her and her ex-husband you cannot put the blame solely on WoW. Granted, it has proven to be a highly addictive game for some people, but you have to consider their personality and their choices. Someone like Peter more than likely has a mental issue and has a problem with addiction. Who is to say that he does not have some other forms of addiction as well? His addiction could as easily have been pot, liquor, porn or meth – if she were to have brought them into the house it would have been a different addiction instead of gaming. You have to go to the underlying source and peel back the layers. Was he unhappy in his marriage to begin with? Was he miserable at his job? Was he highly depressed? Was this form of escape a way to keep from coping with the living hell that his life had become? All of these plus family history can become contributing factors to any sort of addiction.
During her interview with Yahoo! Games, Joycelyn never stated or hinted around about counseling. Did the two of them ever discuss the possibility of therapy? Did she ever consider canceling their internet service, his Blizzard account and throwing his WoW disc in the trash? No one knows the full story of why their marriage collapsed or if anything was done to try and salvage it other than “together time” to watch TV. We may never know, but while this news is indeed sad for the both of them, I mostly feel sorry for Peter because he needs help before his life becomes a vicious cycle of self-loathing and addiction to something worse than a video game. Blaming it all on WoW is just ignorance.
Source: Yahoo! Games
linked from [url]http://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.html?topicId=4665321805&sid=1[/url]
This is why I quit WoW last year, Blizzard is not concerned about keeping the game fun at all levels anymore, their solution is just to offer more ways to grind to endgame. This is what encourages addiction, and they have said nothing about wanting to change this design philosophy. When WoW launched I did recommend it to friends and family, but no longer.
He chose his priorities. I feel sorry Jocelyn; may she find someone who values her more than a game.
I don’t see why this should be such a hot issue with anyone – OTHER than the men/women that have to put up with a significant other that spends all of her/his time playing a video game.
My boyfriend decided to give the game a try not too long ago and before he knew it, he was hooked. He worked night shift, a short day-shift and then he’d go home and just play WoW until it was time to go back to work. He barely slept, he became grumpy/moody/downright friggin mean even. I love video games so I ignored it figuring it was just a new fascination with a new game..no big deal right? Well, like I said, he got mean as hell. Anything that interrupted with WoW time (which was every spare minute) led to hell on earth. And for every other guy and girl I know who’s had a bg/gf hooked on the game, its been the same.
I think gamers need to stop getting so annoyingly defensive about this and just realize that like anything else, video games CAN be an addiction to the right (or just unfortunate) people. The wife in this article didn’t mention anything about therapy but honestly, it’s entirely possible that even therapy wouldn’t have made a difference.
linked from [url]http://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.html?topicId=4665321805&sid=1[/url]
This is why I quit WoW last year, Blizzard is not concerned about keeping the game fun at all levels anymore, their solution is just to offer more ways to grind to endgame. This is what encourages addiction, and they have said nothing about wanting to change this design philosophy. When WoW launched I did recommend it to friends and family, but no longer.
He chose his priorities. I feel sorry Jocelyn; may she find someone who values her more than a game.
i like ur blog =)
My husband and I both played WoW for several years. We did the hard core raiding 7 days a week until wee hours of the morning thing, calls in the middle of the night to get up, log on and kill world dragons (back when they were a big deal) and days off work to explore new content. It was fun. We got over it and found other stuff to do eventually. It’s insane that this woman is blaming the game for her marital problems. The game did not make the guy’s decisions for him. There have to have been other issues in the marriage. Whether or not she was aware of any issues is another matter. A game alone, albiet a very addictive one, cannot by itself ruin a relationship. Heck, log on and play with him! Why does “together time” automatically means doing something she wants to do?
You see, there are too many possible pre-existing issues here. An alcoholic would not turn to alcohol for the first time if they didnt have a problem that disabled them from dealing with their own problems. I am married and have been playing WoW for almost a year now. I have recently moved from a place my wife and I called home for the last 5 years. I use WoW to keep in touch with my friends on the other side of the country, and use it as a way to interact with people that I may never be able to see again. My wife started playing WoW because she missed the social interactions we used to have with our friends, and, since we have only recently moved to a new place, we have not yet had time to make new ones.
WoW serves for many people a way to interact with a world you may not have time to. I know of several parents who play every night together after their children go to bed, because they usually cannot afford to go anywhere, and will not leave their kids home. Should they be restricted from interaction with people? I would say that the few who abuse things make the rest of us look bad.
Not to mention, I have a very good friend I have made in-game, he is seventy years old, and generally immobile. He has no family nearby and says he is too old to make any new friends. He cannot get up and explore the world or do much of anything, but WoW gives him an entire world he CAN access, full of fantastical things and the freedom of choice, unhindered by physical inabilities, not to mention, a place he can go, and make friends.
It’s never the success stories that make the front page, but rather the stories of failure. We should feel bad for both parties in this article, the Woman for not knowing of her husband’s possible addictive personality, and the Husband who needs help. Lets see more front-page success stories, i’d Digg that.
he has the lotion right beside the computer so he is good to go.
Stephany: stop making excuses. WoW is like crack to gamers and this is far too common to try to excuse it by saying he’d be addicted to something else. The fact is, it was WoW he got addicted to, nothing else.
It’s tragic that people choose to ruin their lives over a moronic game, but WoW was designed to get people addicted.
Anyone who has the gall to blame the wife is stupid. It’s very obvious WoW simply took over his life. Marriage problems doesn’t explain why he would suddenly stop paying bills.
“Oh, I hate my wife so much, I’m going to stop paying the bills!” Don’t be ridiculous.
Why can’t people accept the possibility that WoW really did ruin their marriage? It’s a very definite possibility, you can’t always blame it on something else.
WoW is set up to be addictive. It’s how Blizzard makes its money. Isn’t this in any way obvious to the people who try to defend WoW?
IVAN : “I like the way the author says “throwing his WoW disc in the trash” … lol … once installed there is no need for the disc. OMG !!! People if you are writing a piece about a game that you don’t even play … don’t write it.”
If you really think I am that ignorant, nothing I say will make any difference and only give you more fodder thus giving you diarrhea of the mouth – so I will not try and defend myself – but please note I appreciated your candor and the belly laugh it gave me.
Joe: “ok seriously, did you just compare WoW addictions to meth? come on now, that’s going way too far. there are A LOT of people who play WoW obsessively but have not and would not ever touch drugs. It’s a social disorder not an addiction you need to realize that, especially if you’re going to be touting yourself as a gamers news site.”
*rolling eyes*
Did I actually compare it to meth? No, and stop putting words in my mouth. I said that it could has as EASILY been something else he could have become addicted to. No matter what your addition, be it drugs, alcohol, or gaming, if it impacts your life in a NEGATIVE way – you have issues and need professional help.
One more thing – to all the ppl who think I am only taking the ex-husband’s side, you are wrong and I should have been more clear about this in my post. While I do feel bad for Jocelyn, I feel MORE sorry for PETER because HE is the one with the problem, not her. As far as we know, she has ZERO addictions. As far as what steps other than “together time” were taken to save the marriage, it is never mentioned in the original article – but with the media loving horrible stories the way it does and focusing on the controversy instead of the actual meat and potatoes of a situation – Yahoo! Games may have left that part out of the interview for shock effect. The media does it all the time. Speaking of which…..
Jeff: “I’d recommend the author do a bit more research if they are going to venture in these topics
It’s just not fair to readers who may assume that what you say is true. In this case, WoW in particular was probably the sole source of the divorce.”
I never said I was a psychologist – if I was I would be making a lot more money than I am right now.
It was just an observation coming from someone who has indeed been in Jocelyn’s shoes before – but unfortunately it was an addiction much worse than anything Blizzard would or could ever create. But thank you for your very intelligent response. Sometimes, the only time we get comments on a topic such as this is when a bunch of fanboys jump into the fray and act like a bunch of mad three year-olds. Thankfully, that has not happened with this particular post. Well, at least it hasn’t YET. 
I second everything Stephany said.
WoW might be “gamer crack”, but it’s certainly not like meth or real world drug addictions.
Blame it all on WoW. It is addictive and it was set up to be addictive. It is a drug, period. Sure it isnt a real substance but it has exactly the hall marks of any addictive drug and the same affects. I have loads of friends that have basicly ceased to exist because this game DOES NOT END. and they try to beat it anyway. WoW takes over your life to the point that you MUST continue to play
“# lintey says:
February 16th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
like my dad allways told me, get skills or die trying… but anyways, damn those PVEers ruining the life of other people, go arena”
I play WoW for PVE not for PvP, WoW is meant to be PVE how do PVE’rs ruin the life of other people?
I think with the addiction argument ,people need to know that most chemical addictions,drugs,alcohol etc are because of a physical chemical reaction to the substance ingested,most of which takes place in the brain.With any drug especially alcohol.there is no awareness of a problem until literally the first drink.Alcoholism is a disease that affects brain function and a host of other physiological changes,it is not a choice.neither is drug addiction and frankly neither is gaming.It slots into the same group as gamblers only its a psychological payoff rather than financial,and with pokies ,studies have shown peolple will play excessively even under testing circumstances when there is no financial payoff.All the “well done” and “you’re a winner” messages feed a psychological need whilst engendering pleasant physical sensations associated with “winning”.It’s a very complicated issue and psychological addictions are extremely difficult to deal with and believe me when I say,as with chemicals,there does not need to be an underlying issue of any kind to propel someone into full blown addiction.Having said that,it does not help,if you do have issues then it can become an escape mechanism ,and not a true addiction at all.For the couple involved they need help,but he cant and wont until he is ready and as unfortunate as that is for her,it has to run its course.He will stop when it becomes impossible to continue,eg-eviction,job loss,etc.from there then,he will make his climb back to himself,and who knows,shes doing the same thing,maybe they’ll hook up later!!Nothing is ever black and white.
WOW! Haha, I love just saying that repeatedly when my friends are discussing World of Warcraft. I’m more of a tech nerd that works too much than a gamer, so I just stand in the background and randomly blurt out “woooooow” while they discuss aspects of the game. Both of my younger brothers are addicted to it so I hear WoW banter all the time. I just deal with it I suppose.
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ROFL @ VASALINE
Blaming the game 100% is a mistake but MMORPGs are a bit ridiculous in their own right.
WoW is a crafted for one purpose, to addict people so that they keep paying. The concept of a game with no real goals or set missions sounds like an amazing concept, something my gaming group talked about years ago. The problem with games like WoW or, to site another example, Second Life is that it puts you further behind the longer you don’t play. I’m a die-hard gamer and I admit that I tried WoW (and Second Life) and I recognized it for what it was, a pit, a pit that sucks in your time and money. Unfortunately several of our friends started playing WoW and haven’t stopped. They work enough to afford food, electricty, internet and WoW but they dropped out of everything else in life.
You can invest your time in any of a dozen other better games and still pick up a hobby, set up a D&D campaign and spend time with real people all without quiting school and your job, but I’d wager that’s not the case with WoW.
The point is: If you need to find an escape from life… dream; If that doesn’t work out for you, go out and actually lead a ‘Second life’.
great, how much therapy did they go to together? did she ever try and play WoW a little in exchange for him watching tv or doing something stupid she wanted to do? how much did she look into exploring his hobbies and try to find something interesting about them as further insight into the man she may have loved?
whiny bitches are a dime a dozen, so are gaming hermits.
obviously it wasn’t meant to be
game over
and we wait for the next sad tale to blog about..
He plays 24/7 why the hell should she join in? She’s not interested in playing the game, she wants to be with him.
Stop defending your addiction.
I can almost guarantee you that she is lying and her facts are not straight. If she is anything like my former girlfriend, who I broke up with, she is a liar. I play WoW and I played it at her apartment when I was there, but that is because you can not get her off the television. Her eyes are fixed on it the entire day. The only time she gets up is to eat, sleep, go to the doctor and that sort of thing. If you try to hug her, you’ll notice that her eyes are on the TV while you are hugging her. Then she tries to say you aren’t spending enough time with her when you sit on the computer to play WoW for 30 minutes or sit in a raid for 2 hours one night. Pure hypocrite.
If in fact she is lying and he was that stuck on the game, then he may have deserved it. Knowing women though, I can’t be so sure.
its not the games fault its the guys….
its his resposibility to balance all aspects of his life,
im a serious gamer too, but i know theres a time to play games and theres a time to be in a relationship…
its all about being responsible
Hate stories like these.
I play WoW and EQ2, and usually log around between 40 and 100 hours a week. Yet I still manage to go to university, have and spend time with friends, and keep up with rent/apartment chores, etc. The husband was a tool, and should have been able to realize that RL would have to come before gaming, because with 0 RL, eventually there will be 0 ingame life. (Can’t pay for a subscription with no money).
As for the wife, she’s full of shit. A 15 year relationship, including six years of marriage, fallen apart in six months because of a game??? Without any word of addiction counseling? There is NO way that its the only reason for the divorce.
As well, her half an hour of together time? How about more info on that, if I’m at a scheduled raid, and halfway through one of my roommates comes up to me and asks if I want to watch a movie or something, you better believe I’ll tell them to f*** off.
As for Blizzard’s responsibility in these issues, they have their disclaimers that state, every couple of hours it is strongly recommended that you log off for an hour or so. what do they care how much you play? They get the same subscription fee whether you play one hour or every hour of a month.
Generally tho, relationships between hardcore gamers and non-gamers wouldn’t work that well. It’d be like trying to get a relationship to work between hardcore Christian and Muslim people. Its just a really different way of life. The partners have to have an understanding of what the other person needs, and be able to accomodate it, which neither husband or wife seemed able to do.
@ Andrew
The wife stated herself that the husband would “get home from work at 6:00, and start playing at 6:30, then log off at 3″. Thats five and a half hours a night. Which is NOWHERE near 24/7, and which also shows that he still understood that no matter how addicted he became, he would still have to work. When the addiction gets out of control is when he skipped work to play.
I agree with my partner that if she is allowed to watch an hour or two of TV (rubish TV at that) per night, then i am also allowed a few sessions playing on my console/whatever through the week (undisturbed). I’d love to play a lot more but i also like having a good time with my partner (we’ve been together for 5 years), as well as having 5ex.
She doesn’t like me playing on it, thinks it childish, but then realises that i enjoy doing it (incidently i think her TV progs are crap too). As long as i don’t abuse it then we live happily like this and we can respect each others hobbies/interests – BUT we still make time for each other.
Regardless of how much this gent loved the game, clearly he needs to get out more and associate with real people – not pixels
Note – sometimes i leave work early to play
I know that some will disagree with me… The person that wrote that article is a wow addict themselves and is placing blame on the wife for his/her own feelings of guilt. The person obviously sees too much of themselves in the husband and doesn’t like that so shifts the blame to the wife. The wife IS NOT to blame. Just like cigarettes, alcohol, and drugs. you can’t help someone that doesn’t want to be helped. I played WoW and I’m glad that I gave it up.
One day soon the ex-husband will wake up without a job and an eviction notice on his door and wonder what happened.
Ps. Cancelling the internet and throwing the game out may have made this a case of domestic abuse instead of a sad story on gaming addiction.
Well, if old Jocelyn hadn’t let all that fat accumulate in her ass and stopped waxing her mustache, maybe her hubby would have been more attracted to her instead of a video game. If a woman can’t compete with a video game, then there’s something wrong with HER. Try jogging.
Comme quoi meme si tu joues a WoW il faut toujours bien baiser ta femme ! Ca lui evitera de se barrer pour aller se faire baiser ailleurs
Kehpri just proved that they have personally never visited this site until today because if they had they would have known that the author has stated in previous posts and comments that she has never played WoW. Sounds like they are the ones with the secret WoW addiction – do your research and know the site you post comments on before talking out of your junior-high ass.
noobs everyone knows WoW > girls
MMO’s BEFORE HO’s
KICK THAT BITCH TO THE CURB
Before the internet they’d blame it on consoles, before that it was TV, plenty of blame on alcohol and drugs throughout history. Hobbies of all sorts have been blamed forever.
Looks to me more like a sobcase of a scorned woman who didn’t hold her mans attention. If you can’t keep your husband intrigued he will find some other way to occupy his time you can either solve the lack of intrigue, accept that “hey at least he’s home”, or leave. This woman chose option C (notice her choice not his) and then blames husband for her taking the easiest way out. And as a little divoce bonus apparently feels the need to belittle the former “love of her life” in interviews etc. I bet if there is enough traction we might even see a Blizzard lawsuit someday *GASP*
Look at one of the known facts the 6 year investment she let go after only 9 months. She clearly didn’t want to be there either yet the scapegoat is his supposed addiction (all stated by her obviously). Her “better or worse” lasted roughly the time it takes to have a baby which in the grand scheme of life is marriage is nothing.
Best line I think sums up a societal problem of perception in this whole scenario “No one knows the full story of why their marriage collapsed or if anything was done to try and salvage it other than “together time” to watch TV” yes vegging out infront of the TV is “quality” time vs his hobby involving more thought.
I imagine if the “gamer” was an avid reader these stories would be slanted a completely different way.
Sure people get addicted to anything but I don’t see the evidence here. Call us when “Man loses house moves out to the street to keep playing WoW on laptop via free WiFi” and we’ll talk real addiction. Until then it’s someone with out of whack priorities (possibly intentionally) or is just bored that would probably be doing anything to take their break from reality at a certain point in time. A mid life crisis manifesting itself in gaming form instead of a red corvette and 20 year old strippers if you will.
Hello all,
She is NOT blaming Blizzard entirely for this, and may not have gone into her desire to get counseling.
Unless someone has experienced this personally (I lost my wife over this same thing), they can be a peanut gallery and spout off all sorts of arm-chair psych opinions.
NONE OF THEM ARE QUALIFIED, neither professionally or personally to assess this situation.
Only families of addicts (of any kind of addiction) and mental health professionals can speak authoritatively on this topic, and give *qualified* opinions.
As far as “cracking the CDs” or “cancelling their Internet connect” and her not doing so somehow means she “didn’t do everything to save her marriage” is BS. In fact, I was told explicitly by a counselor with 35yrs of addiction experience, with many of it dealing with Internet Addiction, to NOT do either of those things.
If the person is truly addicted, there is no limit to how someone might react. And yes, there are cafes and bars in my town FULL of people that fit the “Man/Woman loses house, moves out to the street to keep playing WoW on laptop via free WiFi.”
…They may not be homeless, but they have lost their family, friends and many times their jobs.
The above poster can redirect the same underlying issue into a “mid-life crisis” or any other name, but this is a real addiction. The argument that “he could have been addicted to X, Y or Z instead of WoW” is a common but faulty, weak and plain stupid idea, usually put forth by people who either refuse to beleive a game could be addicting, or feel like this is an attack on their past time / an attempt to absolve that person of any responsibility.
Internet Addiction, in its many forms (gaming, porn, obsessive surfing / chatting), is a REAL addiction and is almost certain to be included as an official clinical entity in the next release of the Psychology reference for mental illness. That said, her HUSBAND was responsible for this, no matter if he is clinically ill or just lazy.
In the end this destroyed HER marriage. Another may be destroyed by golf, or affairs, or drugs, but those marriages are not the subject of this article…THIS ONE IS…so such “arguments” are irrelevant.
So you think your experience with the subject yet no background on any posters qualifies you to sit back and say “hey poster x has no experience” because you apparently have it all. How wrong you are.
You don’t know any more background than we have all read in the article you can’t make out addiction from this. You see 1 side…the scorned wife who is airing her concerns. Such is the state of people today if it’s in text on the internet it must be how it really happened. The fact is I don’t even see the fairly commonplace symptoms of people you’d like to see take a step back like “called in sick to work”, the closest to it is “he stopped paying the bills” and frankly there could be many underlying reasons why one spouse stops paying bills and the other spouse gets a turn at it. Her infamous example of rejection was him skipping some 30 minute TV show “they” (hey we know relationships so this no doubt means SHE) liked had planned for them to see. Where’s the “I wore his favorite lingerie and he said that’s nice dear before turning back to the screen”, “his family came over and he sat there at his desk in his underwear raiding the whole time”, “he took so many days off work, or went in late all the time until he got fired”, or “now he’s living in his parents basement”.
Take a step back and see that the complaint is he chose the game over her, not over everything else. I like the way wikipedia defines our current use of the word “addiction is used to describe a recurring compulsion by an individual to engage in some specific activity, despite harmful consequences to the individual’s health, mental state or social life” Yet we only see a fraction of this scenario and no background on it, the husbands view, or even anecdotal evidence from the wife of anything being pushed aside but things involving her and her thoughts of how they should be or possibly were at one point in his marriage. You could remake this article as “Blizzard Employee driven to jealousy over WoW” and you’d likely be just as accurate given what we can discern.
Ya she isn’t blaming Blizzard “She also states that WoW was the sole catalyst for the divorce and is still highly emotional about its impact on her marriage.” and “[Blizzard] build it in such a way that you have to keep putting more and more time into it to maintain your status. I remember thinking when I was married that it was downright exploitative to people who couldn’t control themselves in that way. It’s set up like a drug.” – Which is really funny since I as a gamer must say WoW is about the most casual friendly game I’ve played as far as levelling and such goes. Then end game raiding well that’s up to the player and his guildees but there is no driving incentive other than in ones own mind.
“The argument that “he could have been addicted to X, Y or Z instead of WoW” is a common but faulty, weak and plain stupid idea, usually put forth by people who either refuse to beleive a game could be addicting, or feel like this is an attack on their past time / an attempt to absolve that person of any responsibility.”
Deflecting my argument on the limited information we have just shows you buy the whole story as stated hook, line, and sinker just from the one sided report of the wife. No doubt because you apparently went through something similar and it seems to parallel your experience. It’s alright we see it everywhere from recoverees (and their families). Anything that led them down the path to addiction must be a warning sign of a downfall for all others and a wet blanket must be thrown. Newsflash not everyone has control problems with *choose your poison*, some people make rational decisions that may seem irrational to others. I play games including WoW, I do it and other hobbies as a replacement for time in front of the idiot box (called Television). Once in a while I’ll make a decision to play a game instead of doing whatever til later, but on the flipside who’s out there warning all the people watching TV and saying “I’ll get it af a commercial” or “Can we go when Design on a Dime is over sweetie” as addicts. Noone, when it’s a video game involved in a breakup it’s the game/company on taking the brunt of it for churning out addicts, when it’s TV or working on a Hot Rod it’s just called not enough attention and there’s no need for an article or discussion. You can try and sever the link and say “well those other things aren’t relevant to this divorce” but I say they do matter as it’s a sign of some of the issues in our society and works towards the deeper issues of not only divorce but the labeling we use on different scenarios depending on what hot button terms are used.
While Andrews counselor makes a point about the unpredictable behavior that might surface from cutting off a true addict (and possible loss in revenue for the counselor should it actually work…forgive my cynacism). The woman in the article didn’t apparently care anyways when you think about it, it’s an obvious step in a predictable argument chain that would start in month 1 “you don’t pay attention to me anymore” to month 9 “adios muchacho”. Sure progressive couples that tend to think of counseling as a first step and weren’t looking for an excuse to leave would get said counselor’s advice before something abrupt was done, but really for most it’s the last step after you’ve run out of ideas.
and on a parting note. It was THEIR marriage not his or hers. In any partnership at times one side or the other is bound to faulter in some way, that’s when you rely on the other side to help pick up the slack, and by the finish line you hope it’s somewhere near even. Even if she is telling the complete brutal truth she called it quits on 9 months out of over 6 years of bliss and said “see ya sucker”. It doesn’t make sense for anyone truly in love with their spouse. Blame always lies somewhere in the middle from only the fractional view we can see. She didn’t attempt (or doesn’t state that she did) some of the most obvious of solutions to regain his attention, and well he didn’t care enough about his relationship with her obviously. So looks like the were both apathetic to making this particular marriage work if you ask me. WoW is the reason she gives (notice the disbelief of her line about how could he possibly choose fantasy over me) and well we don’t get his side but being men we can probably guess.
“stephany”. To suggest that WoW is not at fault because the husband possesses some addictive trait is absolutely atrocious. how could you even suggest that if she brought meth or porn or marijuana into the house that it would yield the same result? that is ludicrous. you think you can just type in your name and pay $20 and get a months worth of pot? you think that when you smoke meth all you do is smoke meth? no. when you get high, you do other things, as counter-productive as they may be. Blizzard isnt at fault for ruining the marriage, but they ARE at fault for producing a game which is INTENDED to consume the majority of its players free time. its called marketing. the more they play, the more blizzard makes. and they made it so that you never want to quit playing. to suggest that alcohol, pot, meth, and porn(for whatever reason you decided to add pornography, which is nowhere near as addictive as those other substances. of my own experience, the amount of people ive met that are addicted to pornography stands at a ratio of around 1:every other person ive ever known closely enough to know if they are) are in the same category and that its the addicted persons liability is heartless and ignorant. if you intend on being a journalist of any kind i would STRONGLY suggest holding that emotional tongue of yours back and only suggesting fact.
The guy was probably depressed, either through external circumstances, chemical imbalance, bad genetics, or some combination of both. WOW became an escape from reality. The game is not the culprit in the situation, it just happened to be the thing he went to to get away from the things that troubled him. It is a game that does a great job of keeping your attention and keeps your mind off of things through content and very safe interaction through other people. I doubt, as some posters are saying, that Blizzard made a game that’s sole purpose was to suck up people’s time and create addictions in order to keep the bankroll coming. Yes, they want to make money, but they probably just wanted to make a game that people wanted to play, and they made it open ended and limitless so you could always come back to it. It’s not an evil empire, it’s just proof that people will blame a lack of self control and priorities on anything convenient, just like people blame school shootings on violence in television instead of understanding the complex societal issues that create those troubled individuals and the kind of isolation it takes to drive a person to such extremes. Scared people go to seemingly obvious and simple causes to explain things they can’t understand. For example, I used to play the game Call of Duty 4 almost obsessively on a regular basis, not enough to lose time with my girlfriend or lose control of my life, but to the point of mild addiction. I recently switched over to playing WOW and have found it to be less addicting, as the process of grinding can be very boring in stretches. I also use it to keep in touch with my best friend who is away at school and won’t be coming back home when he graduates. It is a really cool way to keep in touch and a lot of fun, a good way to pass time. So I log on usually for an hour or two, possibly longer if I have nothing to do and have the time to vegetate. My point being, all gaming or any hobby you enjoy can become a compulsive thing, and your ability to control whether you use it or abuse it just depends on your mental state and circumstances.
I feel bad for both people, because it is a very hard situation when somebody goes from a relationship that is loving and fulfilling to feeling more and more unloved and neglected over time. It is even harder dealing with a mental disease when it is still widely regarded by society as something that is “all in the head” and not a big deal. I hope the guy in question gets help, and that he learns to enjoy his favorite hobbies in a healthy way while enjoying his relationships and leading a fulfilling life. It will be very possible if he has the right kind of support and sticks with it.
Sad how such a game can tear people apart.
Then again, it was my choice in video games that kept me and my sister apart.
MAKE LOVE, NOT WARCRAFT!
(from south park’s title.)
Lol @ all the morons who posted against the author
You all need get an education and maybe take some psychology classes so you know what the fk you are talking about.
It’s funny how you never hear about all those millions of people that have jobs, families, children… that spend time with them, do what needs to be done in the real world and then raid for a few hours maybe 3-4 nights a week. Maybe play for an hour or two when they get home from work. The fact is.. they have enough of a brain in their heads to know when to log out and leave the computer. If anyone is getting so addicted to the game that they can’t let it go at all during their waking hours, then that’s something that is wrong with that person. Not the game.
“Skwerley says:
“stephany”. To suggest that WoW is not at fault because the husband possesses some addictive trait is absolutely atrocious. how could you even suggest that if she brought meth or porn or marijuana into the house that it would yield the same result? that is ludicrous. you think you can just type in your name and pay $20 and get a months worth of pot? you think that when you smoke meth all you do is smoke meth? no. when you get high, you do other things, as counter-productive as they may be. Blizzard isnt at fault for ruining the marriage, but they ARE at fault for producing a game which is INTENDED to consume the majority of its players free time. its called marketing. the more they play, the more blizzard makes. and they made it so that you never want to quit playing. to suggest that alcohol, pot, meth, and porn(for whatever reason you decided to add pornography, which is nowhere near as addictive as those other substances. of my own experience, the amount of people ive met that are addicted to pornography stands at a ratio of around 1:every other person ive ever known closely enough to know if they are) are in the same category and that its the addicted persons liability is heartless and ignorant. if you intend on being a journalist of any kind i would STRONGLY suggest holding that emotional tongue of yours back and only suggesting fact.”
As far as “holding that emotional tongue of yours back and only suggesting fact” if I “intend on being a journalist” – I have a couple of things to say and this is for everyone else who may be slightly confused like Skwerely is:
THIS IS A NEWS “BLOG”. IT IS FULL OF “OPINIONS” JUST LIKE AN EDITORIAL. WANT BORING STRAIGHT UP NEWS? CLICK THE “LINKS” IN OUR POSTS.
Christ on crutches, do I need to make it any clearer? Should I draw a diagram? Do you not think that opinions are not broadcast with every single news story you get on television, or read in newspapers, magazines, or on the internet? Sure it is, but most of the time it is thinly veiled and not as obvious as in other outlets, our being one of the later.
Skwerely, how old are you? Seriously? If you honestly think that addiction to porn is few and far between, I can give you a list of help groups, and names of people who have had their relationships ruined by their partner’s addiction to porn if you like. Calling my opinion on this “ignorant” is silly considering the fact that you, yourself, do not think it is possible to have an addiction to porn – or maybe I just struck a nerve with you on that one. Regardless, opinions are not WRONG or RIGHT. That is why it is called and opinion, otherwise it would just be news.
i got addicted to wow and then my brother got my account baned and i was like Sh!t what happened over the last six months ive been of the wow for two weeks! but divorce lol
Sounds to me like the guy didn’t want the wife around. He wanted to play wow and not think about her at all. He probably didn’t want to have sex with her or do any housework, says he didn’t pay bills, etc. Basically, he broke up with her. At that point, she was right to leave…I wonder if he even noticed or cared? Obviously he stopped caring for her but did not want to do the messy work of breaking up with her. So seems to me the only logical thing to do in such a situation when your spouse doesn’t want you is to leave. Maybe he really did beg her to stay and loved her and yadda yadda but it sounds like he really didn’t. So if he wants his wow and not his wife, he has it free now. It’s win win. I don’t see the point in placing blame anywhere or getting angry at either of them. He wanted wow, and she wanted a boyfriend. They both wanted different things. She left. Makes sense.
Bah she’ll get over it WOW on dude, Thats what ladies of the evening are for !!!!!
As long as there will never be a WoW Anonymous, I’ll be fine.
Maybe she wasn’t worth HIS time.
I don’t find it hard to deal with, though. He’s having fun, why should I interrupt him?
Well, what do you expect? Those dailies and epics aren’t going to grind themselves.