Comments on: Editorial: Beware the Child-Man?

By: Mrs. Child man

Mrs. Child man — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 18:59:05 +0000

I am a 23 year old married woman and consider both myself and my 24 year old husband child man and child woman.We love to play games, relax, go out to eat, and really enjoy immature movies. I mean, we are financially independant, own our own home, and are married of course but we are in no ways looking to “grow up” because I’ve watched people “grow up”, have kids,take life too seriously, and stop living for the moment.I want no part of it and probabky never will.

By: Aliya

Aliya — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 21:52:23 +0000

“bill says:
January 30th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
“Young men were no longer rushing to the alter or marrying childhood sweethearts and she seems to place the cause of this on games for one.”

Well, it could be that…or maybe it’s the fact that garbage like Sex and the City has turned at least 75% of girls in our age bracket into semi-psychotic materialistic airheads with a single thought process (”affection = handbags/jewelry”) that make relatively normal guys like myself shudder at the thought of settling down with one. No thanks, I’ll keep playing Mass Effect and dating around until I find one that doesn’t make me want to gnaw on broken glass.”

LOL! I am a Woman and I agree With You Bill.I don’t even like to be around MY OWN KIND! They talk about Shoes,Coach Purses, and Diamond Tennis Bracelets. I can’t stand Greedy, Consumer Driven Women!

By: Semper Fi Guy

Semper Fi Guy — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 18:50:44 +0000

Unhappily Married with Kids. its like you are describing my life.Its freaky. I just want to let you know that you are not alone. I have been planning on leaving my wife since just a while after my first son was born. The only reason I have not after two more kids later is that she would probably get everything so I have just had a relationship on the side. I know it is wrong but the side woman is who feels right to me.

By: married girl

married girl — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:20:15 +0000

Games are fine as long as everything else in life balances out.

By: Dude

Dude — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 18:18:19 +0000

” UNHAPPILY ”

I totally Relate! Except I am already divorced. I am much happier, by the way. I have two kids. A boy and a girl. My ex-wife has them one week, I the next, and so on and so on.They are four and six. My ex is happier also.We just grew apart and I think we were not particularly right for each other in the first place.She was a snooty perfectionist and I am a video game playing rocker type. I have met someone new and we have tons in common and the kids love her. My ex has also found someone new who is more her type. Neither of us has remarried, but it seems it will be in the cards. So, what I am getting at I guess is that the video games are not a child-man thing. It is a personality thing.There ARE female gamers.Also, UNHAPPILY…. you may want to consider divorce. You DO NOT want to feel STUCK for the rest of your life. I doubt your wife would take your kids away from you.No mother would deny a Father for their Child. No if they are in their right mind.

By: unhappily married with kids

unhappily married with kids — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 21:36:52 +0000

I would love to go back to being single without kids. I love my kids, but do sometimes resent them.I work and work and work to support them and my lazy “babysitting” wife who breathes down my neck about every damn thing I buy even though Im the one who makes most of the money and she could not hold down a job. If I have any advice for the guys reading this….STAY a Child-Man and focus on YOUR happiness. or just try to marry the right person. I made the mistake of marrying the wrong one and am basically stuck with it or I lose everything probably even my kids.

By: C

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 14:39:46 +0000

I don’t need to read this womans stupid story, most men lived with their Mother for 18 years already so understand the psyche. I cancelled my cable because I grew tired of watching the denigration of men. I like video games because it is a GREAT stress killer. Plenty of women make great friends and lovers, but men tire of pissing around with the life of the American woman dream. Obviously, from what the media broadcasts I’m supposed to be her slave. Well, haha, with the feminist movement the way it is I’m much happier being and living alone. Chasing women was the biggest waste of time out of everything I’ve done in life so far.

By: Candide

Candide — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 06:20:45 +0000

@Andi. Welcome to the deal the modern married MAN is expected to uphold. Were the circumstances reversed, the response would be to “grow a pair, suck it up and deal”. I’d bet you’d REALLY appreciate it were that “slacker” man of yours were to divorce you, get the kids, the house, along with 1/2 of YOUR “imputed” income AND child support while he dicks you around over custody. NOW do you appreciate why men suffer from a wimpy “fear of commitment”? Notice, too that the term wimp ONLY applies to men.

By: JC Prime

JC Prime — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 22:01:08 +0000

All I can say is this, and I relize it may sound lame “With great power comes greater responsibility”. Yes, it’s a Spider-man quote but it holds true.
Marriage and children are a responsibility NOT an obligation. You have the power to CHOOSE when or if to get married and have children.
You don’t get married if both aren’t ready for it. You DO NOT have children if one or both of you feels “it’s not the right time”.

What people need to understand is that it’s not about pressure, it’s not about obligation, it’s not about social roles in society, it’s 100% all abour taking responsibility. If you and your partner are NOT ready, DO NOT DO IT!
It has nothing to do with being immature, in fact it’s the opposite. There is nothing more mature than deciding if the time to marry or have children is right or not.
Do you REALLY think forcing 2 people who aren’t ready to marry and have children is a GOOD thing? That’s about as immature and irresposible as it gets.
Forget the “man-child” video game argument! Think about the childrens future first. If you are a man and content playing video games and not ready for wife and kids, do what feels right. If you are a woman content on buying shoes, purses and hats and not ready for a husband and kids, do what feels right.
Whatever the leissure activity may be, be it video games or materialistic needs (both male and female) you need to do what YOU feel is best and not what people tell you is best. (irony 101 = feel free to disregard this post if you’d like since i’m sort of in a way telling people what to do. Well, maybe more of a suggestion) lol.
The point is, be responsible first!

By: Hoh

Hoh — Sun, 03 Feb 2008 18:07:35 +0000

I blame black people for the man-child problem!

By: TheManOnTheStreet

TheManOnTheStreet — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 15:18:22 +0000

Fell for it.. the lot of you. What better way to get your name out there in the “editorial world” than to put something forth that will undoubtedly piss off a few thousand folks?

She probably doesn’t even believe what she wrote. She KNEW it would garner “contraversial dialogues”…. that is why she did it.

Attention whore.. nothing more. Indicated by the constant links back…

TMOTS

By: John

John — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 12:33:39 +0000

My favourite bit: “The SYM doesn’t read much, remember, and he certainly doesn’t read anything prescribing personal transformation.”

Because healthy adults read nothing but self-help books?

By: DinaBeans

DinaBeans — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 12:29:25 +0000

Well it is the same for women too, at mid thirties they like to meet friends and sit in coffee shops rather then take care of children and husband,

By: somewhat

somewhat — Sat, 02 Feb 2008 00:43:06 +0000

@ IAN about half way up
FUTURAMA !
(36 years old, and proud to be a kid !)

By: ManOfTeal

ManOfTeal — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 22:00:33 +0000

I like pie

By: Bob Dobalina

Bob Dobalina — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 19:47:33 +0000

And women are the typical homemakers of generations past??

Bah!

By: Susan Anderson

Susan Anderson — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 19:27:17 +0000

I agree with previous posters that it’s all about economics. The fact is, even a lavish “Sex and the City” lifestyle, with dinners out and expensive shoes and vacations, is far cheaper than trying to afford even one child, what with the cost of daycare. So people are making a rational economic decision to be hedonistic over “responsible” given the choices available.

By: Lord Garrius

Lord Garrius — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 16:40:28 +0000

I put the blame squarely on the NOW crowd. Lets face it, in the past the reason most men got married was because they wanted/needed to have sex on a regular basis. They may also like the girl and that was bonus. But sex was biggest driving factor. Well, since the feminists decided that the old rules of women playing the hard to get were old fashioned and needed to be discarded, men now have the best of both worlds. This maybe shallow by why would a man commit to any one woman when he knows he can go out to a bar any night of the week, meet some nice girl and have sex with her that same night. Why buy the cow when you’re getting the milk for free? Anyway, just my two cents.

By: Thallia

Thallia — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 15:20:35 +0000

Interesting that Hymowitz doesn’t address people like me, and there are a lot of us: 30-something women who were told to work hard and become independent, who now have solid careers and nice houses (and maybe designer clothes and shoes, though I’m not into that myself) but no committed relationships with men because we were told by our mother’s generation that we didn’t need them. That’s the real cost of the feminist movement.

By: Dr. NW

Dr. NW — Fri, 01 Feb 2008 12:38:39 +0000

With obesity now afflicting around 30% of the population of the United States, I’d say that it’s much more difficult these days for a man to find a woman who is sexual desirable and with whom he would like to procreate. I believe there is a correlation there, but it needs to be studied.