It seems that the upcoming demo of the game will be available to players who pre-order the title before it hits general outlets. The details are sparse at the moment but this early access will likely be to the same content the rest of the world will get when the multiplayer demo hits Steam and Xbox Live, just a teensy bit earlier.

I understand Valve wanting to feed the L4D 2 hype, but as far as pre-order incentives go this one just seems to be a bit too lame duck to me. Offer an exclusive level or weapon or heck, maybe give us access to a member of the original game in our L4D 2 play, but giving out the same demo just earlier seems like an epic undersell of a much anticipated/debated sequel.

The complete annotated list includes:

• Armed and Dangerous™
• Indiana Jones® and the Fate of Atlantis
• Indiana Jones® and the Last Crusade: The Graphic Adventure
• LEGO® Indiana Jones: The Original Adventure
• LOOM™
• Star Wars Battlefront® II
• Star Wars Republic Commando®
• Star Wars Starfighter™
• The Dig®
• Thrillville®: Off the Rails™

It definitely looks like Lucasarts is trying to recapture the the glory days of the company before it became the “bad” Star Wars game and LEGO tie-in company. The games will be released on the Xbox 360 via Live! as well.

There are a few more games I’d love to see make this list like the Maniac Mansion games, or Grim Fandango – by Tim Schafer – lately the mind behind Psychonauts and Brutal Legend.  Till then however I think I might just consider picking up another copy of Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis and LOOM.

Tripwire has released an update for the cooperative survival horror title Killing Floor. The game should update automatically when you start Steam eradicating bugs and nerfing some exploits. Players will also get a few perk tweaks to balance out those exploit fixes. You’ll find a full list of fixes and tweaks after the jump.

One more thing. There’s still time to get in on the “Killing Floor Grindhouse” custom map making competition. However you’d better get a move on. If you want to score that $10,000 cash prize you have less than a month to get your entry together for Wave 1. The full contest rules are available at the official “Killing Floor Grindhouse” map contest site.

Fixes:

• Fixed a memory leak causing performance to degrade the longer you played when in multiplayer (resulting in very low framerate sometimes in the final waves).
• Improved texture and file precaching to reduce issues with hitching.
• Voice Over IP is now usable in the Lobby Menu while waiting for everyone to ready up.
• Cash amount in the Trader Menu updates when someone gives you money while trading.
• Improved the readability of chat fonts.
• All melee weapons now have an alt-fire, which is a “power strike”.
• Fixed the timing for when damage occurs from melee weapons.
• Added a Map White List which will now only allow perks to be earned on official and approved custom maps (Makes maps such as KF-Leveling worthless).
• Fixed “Connection Failed” endless loop when failing to connect to a server and clicking the Back button in the Server Browser.
• Fixed Zeds sliding instead of animating online at particular times.
• Fixed blowing off the limbs of live Zeds, such as the Bloat’s legs.
• Added random moving attacks for specimens that would always just stop and attack before (Bloat, Gorefast, Scrake). This makes the attacks less predictable, and players can no longer just backpedel to escape any attack from these Zeds.
• New Scrake behavior – the Scrake will now rage sooner, and will now keep moving toward its target when attacking. Additionally, it will randomly charge at its target when attacking, making the Scrake more effective.
• Added improved behavior for FleshPound to prevent “kiting”. The Fleshpound will now get frustrated and charge players regardless of if it is shot if players keep moving away from it.
• Fixed Joining as Spectator not allowing you to View players.
• Fixed Spectators needing to “Ready” before game will start.
• Improved some of the fonts for in-game messages and interface text.
• Interface tweaks

Perk Tweaks:

• Decreased Shotgun Penetration power of the Support Perk
• Increased Ammo Capacity of Bullpup for Commando Perk
• Increased the Reload speed bonus of the Commando Perk
• Decreased the Stalker Kills requirement of the Commando Perk
• Decreased Lever Action Rifle cocking time for the Sharpshooter Perk
• Assigned 9mm to Sharpshooter Perk(9mm headshots count toward Perk and all bonuses now apply to 9mm as well)
• Reduced movement speed for Medic Perk to deter “kiting”
• Increased Reload Speed for Firebug Perk
• Increased Ammo Capacity of FlameThrower for Firebug Perk

The post includes some roughs and I found Combine Nation, which is like Combine Cops, and Ignis Solus which is like an existential art piece with flamethrowers. We keep having this debate as games not being or creating art.. but these cinema pieces definitely show that while you may debate the merits of games themselves, as tools of creation they can be something quite a bit more.

The post also links to some interesting series like Maintenance Man, Freeman’s Mind and Escape from City 17, a live action production I mentioned a few months back.

Here’s a quick reminder of how awesome video editing can make HL2 a tool for movie creation:

Any way you cut it the convergence of games and cinema is here.. lucky us, we just get to sit back and enjoy the results. I’m always on the look out for new series or shorts, feel free to share your favorites in the discussion boards in this post and maybe we’ll highlight them in a future article.

Just a quick.. ” Why have you not bought this yet? and if you were waiting.. don’t!” sort of new post regarding this week’s Steam bargain – Sega’s Empire: Total War.

I realize there are a lot of folks out there who don’t have the patience for or interest in a historical strategy title but let me leave you with one really cool detail: Empire has Ship to Ship fighting on the high seas with pixel level physics and modeling.. you can actually shoot through an opponent’s boat and hit another enemy on the far side!

Come on.. who doesn’t think that is one of the most awesome things to even get simulated in an RTS?

So don’t wait, run and pick up the Steam version of the game for 50% off this weekend. Its worth the full price but why not just save yourself some money now? Yes, for the record, this is an official endorsement.. this game rocks!

I haven’t really weighed in on this one yet, but it’s about time.

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? Quite simply, you’re nothing more than a bunch of over-entitled babies.

You know, I could almost understand it, if you’d bought L4D as a single-player game only. After all, as a single-player experience, L4D was sort of lacking. Unfortunately for you, you’ve got a Steam group, and most, if not all of you are playing L4D online regularly. So that argument (the only one available) is moot.

Wait, who’s that waving their hand at me? Ah, that’s one of the whiners, trying to convince me that Valve hates gamers now. SHUT. UP. Valve has always supported gamers, and given excellent support to their products. I’m perfectly willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, especially since they’ve already said that they have more content slated to release for L4D (four player matchmaking, for example).

Additionally, since I’m not a self-entitled idiot, I can understand the business situation as well, something gamers never seem to understand. With the sweeping changes Valve is making to Left 4 Dead 2, it would be nearly impossible to update the console version of the original game to accommodate them. So, either these people think Valve should forgo profits simply to make them happy, or that Valve should forgo a console release of this content. How moronic.

Thankfully, Valve isn’t listening to them, and we’re all going to be better off for it.

Earlier today gaming blog Kotaku posted a five minute preview segment of gameplay from Left 4 Dead. The footage includes the melee weapons in action, some new special infected footage and more suntanning zombies than you can shake a stick at.

I previously commented on why I think this was a bad move for the developer but I’ll likely be the first to admit I’m “jonesing” for some new L4D options, the original offerings are growing stale so like a zombie smack junkie.. well Valve you’ve got me on the hook for the next one as well if this video is any indication.

In wake of recent announcement that Valve would be releasing Left 4 Dead 2 this November, a small part of its community has responded with reception that would otherwise seem warm only to a zombie’s touch. The Left 4 Dead 2 Boycott Steam Community Group is not only upset with the recent announcement of a L4D sequel, but they feel that, no thanks to Valve, they have literally been Left 4 Dead. The group is not only a representation of L4D fans willing to boycott the full-blown sequel come November, but it also serves as a movement to educate the masses and point out repercussions a timely sequel will have on the present day L4D community.

Glancing at their Steam Community page, the group’s leaders have even gone to the trouble of establishing a manifesto outlining major points in their global argument that having a L4D sequel right now is a bad idea. Major points in the manifesto that stick out are that the group are foremost believers in Valve’s dedication to improving its past and current products, that until L4D2 hits shelves judgment can not be made, and that L4D2 will essentially split the community. I’ve copied and pasted the entire manifesto at the tail of this article.

The Left 4 Dead 2 boycott movement is, as of today, 20,000+ and growing strong. They have sent their manifesto to Valve. They have established a moderated public forum from which anyone can voice their opinions (assuming you behave). While this particular editor (and fellow zombie annihilator) will not be joining their ranks, I do find their sincerity and professionalism quite refreshing. They are off to a good start and I wish them luck.

If you are contemplating joining their crusade, there are some things I’d like to point out about their little group that peeve me still:

Thus far, I find the group have failed to recognize that L4D2 actually represents the evolution of DLC originally intended for L4D, that is, if you find Valve’s PR trustworthy. According to Valve, the original L4D DLC project grew into gargantuan proportions, thus forcing the developers to recognize the project as having much more potential.

So, lo and behold, we have Left 4 Dead 2. Whether the timing is bad is a matter of opinion. I do not put much weight into a ‘L4D2 effect’ splitting the community.

Also worth noting is that the price for L4D2 has not yet been established. This could have a large impact on a consumer’s decision to purchase the game come November.

I’m sure Valve are very aware that Left 4 Dead 2 will be heavily criticized based on its content this time around. One of the biggest gripes with L4D was its lack of content for a $50 game. However, L4D still sold like hotcakes – most likely because the game itself was somewhat breakthrough given its production value.

Rest assured, L4D2 will be under a microscope this time around. Unless Valve have miraculously stumbled across some ‘revolutionary’ thing that makes L4D2 just as special as its predecessor, they won’t get to play that ‘trust me, it’s worth fifty dollars’ card again.

The Left 4 Dead 2 Boycott Group Manifesto:

WE RECOGNIZE:

• Valve is a company with financial needs and cannot be expected to survive without the release of new games.
• Judgment cannot be passed on the quality of Left 4 Dead 2 until its release.
• Left 4 Dead was, and is, a quality game which deserves the praise of the entire gaming community.

WE ARE COMMITTED:

• To holding Valve to its promise of free, continual updates to Left 4 Dead in order to build and sustain the community.
• To keeping the Left 4 Dead community together in order to improve the quality of online gaming.
• To supporting the model of continual updates Valve has set forth with its staple products like Team Fortress 2.

WE BELIEVE:

• The release of Left 4 Dead 2 as a stand-alone sequel will split the communities and decrease the quality of multiplayer gaming.
• The announced content of Left 4 Dead 2 does not warrant a stand-alone, full-priced sequel and should instead become updates (free or otherwise) for Left 4 Dead.
• Left 4 Dead has not yet received the support and content which Valve has repeatedly stated will be delivered.
• The release of Left 4 Dead 2 will make Left 4 Dead an obsolete purchase and inferior piece of software after only one year since release.

WE REQUEST:

• That Valve honor its commitment to release ongoing periodic content for Left 4 Dead.
• That Left 4 Dead 2 not be released as a stand-alone, full-priced sequel but as either a free update to Left 4 Dead or an expansion with full compatibility with basic Left 4 Dead owners.
• That Left 4 Dead owners be given discounts for Left 4 Dead 2, should it be released as premium content.

Of course L4D2 is a mature rated game so I’ve put the new video after the jump. Check out the Left4Dead2 E3 teaser trailer after the jump.

Look for the zombie invasion on the Xbox 360 and PC this fall as Left4Dead2 hits stores November 17, 2009. I know what I’ll be doing on my Thanksgiving break.

Left4Dead is less than a year old. It shipped with a very slight amount of content, only got added value with the later Survivor patch and is only now getting mod support from the community and rather than expand it and give us a more reasonably sized game.. we’re being fed a sequel.

More Zombie killing is a goal I subscribe to religiously. I love Left4Dead, I played the heck out of it for months until the 4 basic scenarios wore dry and even the injection of new content with the recent patch didn’t work to vary or sate that apathy much. The original gang isn’t done, I want more adventures, more maps and scenarios and frankly more value from that initial purchase – just as Valve promised.

The trailer and accompanying press release also worry me because the features they tout for the upcoming continuation don’t seem earthshaking or innovative, or like additions that don’t belong in a patch for the original game. What I’m referring to is the addition of more melee-centric weapons and combat, and an upgraded AI Director. Then there is this statement:

“Featuring new Survivors, boss zombies, weapons, and items, Left 4 Dead 2 offers a much larger game than the original with more co-operative campaigns, more Versus campaigns, and maps for Survival mode available at launch.”

Who is responsible for L4D not having a great selection of content, modes or characters?

Well the same people who are now expecting us to shill out full price yet again to support their hype machine. I’m an ardent supporter of Valve over the years but this move really bugs me. We’re still waiting on Half-Life 2 Episode 3 to wrap that story up – 4 years later – and yet they can crank out another money grab in the form of an L4D sequel. Valve doesn’t patch or fix problems with the 360 version of the Orange Box, yet they can produce an entirely new L4D product? Something smells here and while the “freeness” of the Survivor patch is a great move in an industry increasingly based on selling you parts of their completed game after release as a continued revenue stream, I am afraid with the current information in hand I may have to change my position on Valve and its formerly consumer friendly posture.

The new title is scheduled to ship on November 17th for Xbox 360 and PC, just in time for the Christmas rush, and features an apparent Southern US setting and characters including “Inbred Tank” and a multi-ethnic survivor team. I’m sorry but I think I’m going to take a pass here.. until I see something that shows a sequel was needed to the game, and this is not just more than a simple tech upgrade with new maps and re-skinned characters. You can view the full details of the press release after the jump.

VALVE ANNOUNCES LEFT 4 DEAD 2

Sequel to Best-Selling Co-op Thriller Coming This Holiday

June 1, 2009 – Valve, creators of best-selling game franchises (such as Half-Life and Counter-Strike) and leading technologies (such as Steam and Source), today announced Left 4 Dead 2 (L4D2), the sequel to the best-selling and critically-acclaimed co-operative multiplayer thriller.

Coming exclusively to Xbox 360 and PC, L4D2 promises to set a new benchmark for co-operative action games and become one of 2009’s marquee titles.

“A large part of how Left 4 Dead became 2008’s top-selling new IP on Xbox 360 and the PC was the custom-tailored gameplay made possible by the AI Director,” said Gabe Newell, president and co-founder of Valve. “With the knowledge gained from creating the original, new technology, and a passionate team, L4D2 will set a new benchmark for cooperative action games.”

Set for release on November 17, the title adds melee combat to enable deeper co-operative gameplay, with items such as a chainsaw, frying pan, axe, baseball bat, and more.

Introducing the AI Director 2.0, L4D’s dynamic gameplay is taken to the next level by giving the Director the ability to procedurally change weather effects, world objects, and pathways in addition to tailoring the enemy population, effects, and sounds to match the players’ performance. The result is a unique game session custom fitted to provide a satisfying and uniquely challenging experience each time the game is played.

Featuring new Survivors, boss zombies, weapons, and items, Left 4 Dead 2 offers a much larger game than the original with more co-operative campaigns, more Versus campaigns, and maps for Survival mode available at launch.

Supported by a $10+ million marketing campaign, Left 4 Dead has sold over 2.5 million retail copies since it was released in November of 2008. Left 4 Dead 2 is targeted for release on Xbox 360 and the PC on November 17, 2009, and will be launched worldwide with a multi-million dollar marketing campaign across TV, Outdoor, and Online.

“Left 4 Dead was backed by our most aggressive advertising campaign to date, and resulted in a top 5 showing on two platforms during holiday 2008,” said Doug Lombardi, VP of marketing at Valve. “Left 4 Dead 2 is a larger game and will be supported with even more consumer and retail advertising programs than the original.”

Left 4 Dead 2 will be featured as the cover story on PC Gamer and Official Xbox Magazines this month. For more information, please visit www.l4d.com

The largest update to Team Fortress 2 ever has been released!

In celebration, Valve are making it a free-to-play weekend (starting now) for TF2 as well as making the full game 50% off ( = $10 USD) at the Steam Store during the period.

To recap, here are the upgrades the Sniper and Spy class are getting:

Sniper

New taunt for the Kritzkrieg, which also heals for 10 points

The update is automatically applied when you login to Steam. Happy hunting, gentlemen/mates!

RELEASE NOTES

Maps

• Added new map, Pipeline. Pipeline is the first map in a new game mode named payload race, which uses two carts in each map instead of only one like traditional payload maps
• Added new arena map Sawmill
• Added new arena map Nucleus
• Added new community payload map Hoodoo
• Updated Dustbowl to fix not being able to jump into the window in the first building of the second stage
  
  Sniper Changes

• Added new sniper rifle replacement, The Huntsman. Instead of a sniper rifle, you have a bow that allows you to move around faster while firing, and fire more quickly than the sniper rifle. Works better at medium range than the standard rifle
• Added new SMG replacement, Jarate. If thrown on an enemy they will take more damage for short period of time. Also extinguishes flames on yourself or allies
• Added new SMG replacement, The Razorback. Will protect you against a single spy backstab, and stun the spy for a short period of time. Comes with a 15% move speed penalty for the wearer
• Standard sniper rifle now shoots through friendly players
• Added 54 new Sniper voice lines
• Added 35 new Sniper achievements
  
  Spy

• Added new revolver replacement, The Ambassador. First shot is very accurate and will cause a critical hit if it hits an enemy’s head. Accuracy is poor for a period after that
• Added new watch replacement, the Dead Ringer. When armed, you will appear in all ways to die to the first damage you take from an enemy. You’ll be cloaked for 8 second after taking this damage. Upon de-cloaking you’ll make a loud, distinct sound
• Added new watch replacement, the Cloak and Dagger. Your cloak meter is only depleted when you move, so you can stay invisible indefinitely if you’re standing still
• Spy name tags now show up properly when disguised as their own team
• Fixed a bug that would cause spectators to see disguise weapons incorrectly
• Fixed a bug where enemy spies disguised as friendly spies would have cigarettes that didn’t burn
• Fixed a bug where overhealing disguised spies would show the wrong overhealing amount to the medic
• Made it more obvious on first person view model when your motion cloak is out of juice and you are partially visible
• Also made it more obvious on first person view model when you’re bumped while cloaked
• Improved the way your disguise weapon is determined to make it clearer and fix a couple of rare issues
• Spies disguised as enemy spies now get a random mask to help complete the disguise, and their target id will be set appropriately
• Spies disguised as medics now have an Ubercharge: line in their disguise target info
• Spies outward facing “disguise health” now matches their disguise target when they first apply the disguise
• Spies can now pick up health kits for their “disguise health”, even when uninjured
• Disguise UI doesn’t show up in minimum UI mode (hud_minmode)
• Spies that disguise as a player using an unlockable now show that unlockable in hand
• Spies can now use enemy teleporters
• Added 70 new Spy voice lines
• Added 34 new Spy achievements
  
  Scoreboard changes

• Dominations no longer get wiped when teams switch sides
• Dead players draw slightly darker in scoreboard
• Converted class labels to class icons
• All players now display the total number of people they are dominating
  
  General

• You now find new and old items as you play, instead of through achievements
• Fixed a bug that would cause the scout’s ball to regenerate at inappropriate times
• Demomen can now detonate their stickies while taunting
• Flamethrower’s air burst now extinguishes fire on friendly targets
• Grenades and rockets deflected by a pyro under the effects of Kritzkrieg will now be criticals
• The Heavy and Sniper now have new custom death animations
• Fixed payload HUD not updating properly if you join in the middle of a match and the cart isn’t moving
• Engineer’s dispensers now give 20%, 30%, or 40% of player’s max_ammo (for each ammo type) on each use, based on the level of the dispenser
• Added -sillygibs commandline parameter which will allow the non-violent gibs to be enabled
• Added a new taunt for the Kritzkrieg, which also heals for 10 points
• Improved the deathcam camera handling used when a player plays a custom death animation
• Added missing chalkboard and serverbrowser images for community maps shipped in previous updates
• Removed “Final” from map names in the serverbrowser quick list
  
  Servers

• Added “sv_allow_voice_from_file” convar, which defaults to 1. When set to 0, it’ll prevent clients from using the “voice_inputfromfile” feature to broadcast wav files over voice
• Enabled “sv_allow_wait_command” convar, which defaults to 1. When set to 0, it’ll prevent clients from using the “wait” command

The seventh and final preview of the tomorrow’s Sniper/Spy dual update to Team Fortress 2 is upon us, and Valve come bearing gifts.

First off, it looks like the sharp shooting Aussie is getting that jar of pee that we all thought was an April Fool’s joke over a month ago. Could be bad news for Spies and Pyros:

Jarate – The Jar-Based Karate

Jarate is a thrown jar that splashes upon impact. When splashed on enemies, they take 35% more damage for a period of time. Jumping in water will wash off Jarate. Jarate is also able to short out Spies’ cloaking devices. When used on teammates, Jarate will extinguish any fire effects.

Also revealed are 35 brand new achievements for the Sniper class. As a fellow TF2 geek pointed out, some of these seem to be inspired by the ‘Meet The Sniper‘ video.

And finally, in celebration of all the hard work towards bringing TF2 fans these free updates, Valve are making this weekend a free TF2 weekend starting tomorrow. So if you or your buddy haven’t experienced what all the fuss is about, now is the time.

A list of the new 35 achievements and a funny web-comic for the Sniper found after the break.

1. Australian Rules
2. Be Efficient
3. Be Polite
4. Beaux and Arrows
5. Consolation Prize
6. Dead Reckoning
7. De-sentry-lized
8. Dropped Dead
9. Enemy at the Gate
10. Friendship is Golden
11. Have a Plan
12. Jarate Chop
13. Jarring Transition
14. Jumper Stumper
15. Kill Everyone You Meet
16. Kook the Spook
17. My Brilliant Career
18. Not a Crazed Gunman, Dad
19. Number One Assistant
20. Parting Shot
21. Pincushion
22. Rain on Their Parade
23. Robbin’ Hood
24. Rode Hard, Put Away Wet
25. Saturation Bombing
26. Self-destruct Sequence
27. Shafted
28. Shock Treatment
29. Shoot the Breeze
30. Socket to Him
31. The Last Wave
32. Triple Prey
33. Trust Your Feelings
34. Uberectomy
35. William Tell Overkill

Download a Hi-Res Icon set for the Sniper achievements here.

Yep, it is that time again. Today is the sixth day of previews for the upcoming Sniper/Spy dual update to Team Fortress 2.

This time it looks like our Incognito Amigo is getting a new hand-cannon conveniently dubbed ‘The Ambassador’. Looking more like a piece of art than a weapon, this baby packs some serious wallop. Got a dispute with an enemy sniper or soldier? Call in ‘The Ambassador’. Your new “field cannon without wheels” will have those red/blue team babies waving a white flag after the smoke has cleared.

Or in Valve’s own words:

“There are two sorts of men in this world: the sort with blood pouring out of a hole in their heads, and the sort holding the Ambassador. It has the ammo count of a revolver and the pinpoint accuracy of a sniper rifle, even at long range. (But remember, a gun that packs this much heat needs to cool off between shots, so make every shot count.)

With its rosewood grip and likeness of your enemy’s mother (please send photo) engraved on the barrel, the Ambassador is eight motherloving pounds of steel your enemies won’t want to negotiate with.”

For some reason, after reading that, I want to yell out Jules’ (Samuel L. Jackson) sermon from Pulp Fiction.

Expect updates for the Sniper and Spy to roll out this Thursday via Steam.

After accidentally leaking the “Meet The Spy” video (above) on YouTube this weekend, Valve felt it should award itself with a “Fail” achievement. And so they did:

If you take a look over at the official Team Fortress 2 website, Valve have not only released the official “Meet The Spy” video (don’t worry, the one above is the “official” one), but they have also revealed 34 new Spy achievements to go along with the upcoming Sniper/Spy dual updates that go live this Thursday. I’ve listed them after the jump.

Note: “Fail” achievement is for Valve only. Neener!

And in case you missed it, Day 1, 2, 3, & 4 coverage of the TF2 Sniper/Spy updates.

The New Spy Achievements

1. A Cut Above
2. Agent Provocateur
3. Burn Notice
4. Come in From the Cold
5. Constructus Interruptus
6. Counter Espionage
7. Deep Undercover
8. Die Another Way
9. Diplomacy
10. Dr. Nooooo
11. For Your Eyes Only
12. FYI I am a Spy
13. High Value Target
14. Identity Theft
15. Insurance Fraud
16. Is It Safe?
17. Joint Operation
18. May I Cut In?
19. On Her Majesty’s Secret Surface
20. Point Breaker
21. Sap Auteur
22. Sapsucker
23. Skullpluggery
24. Slash and Burn
25. Sleeper Agent
26. Spies Like Us
27. Spymaster
28. The Man from P.U.N.C.T.U.R.E.
29. The Man with the Broken Guns
30. The Melbourne Supremacy
31. Triplecrossed
32. Wetwork
33. Who’s Your Daddy?
34. You Only Shiv Thrice

You can download an entire hi-res icon set of the Spy achievements here.

Someone over at Valve has a sick sense of humor.

While many TF2 Snipers were eagerly awaiting news of something that would replace his “weak ass melee weapon”, the Kukri, with something far more useful, instead they get stabbed in the back, Spy style. The image above, taken from the official Team Fortress 2 website, shows our Aussie face down with his nemesis standing next to him, mocking him in a way only a person of his seedy profession would: by smoking a cig in his victim’s honor.

The crossed out text originally reading “The Sniper Update” is instead changed to “The Spy Update”, thus revealing the shocking finality of it all. Yes, begin the Spy Updates.

Today’s update to the Team Fortress 2 website, which was, as far as we can tell, originally intended for the Sniper class, instead reveals updates for his arch-nemesis: The Spy. Irony seems to be ever present here, as yesterday’s revelation yielded the Sniper class would be getting something to finally thwart those cigarette toting backstabbing bastards. Perhaps the ensuing overzealous Sniper mobs angered the gods with their uncontrollable laughter, orgy-like celebration, and idolatry of golden calves? Or maybe Valve just couldn’t wait any longer to tell us what they have in store for their Spy class?

Read more to find out.

In any event, today’s update is presented in a classic style, back of the magazine, catalog format that, I dare say, you just don’t see anymore (yet, for some reason I hunger for Wendy’s). It seems our dear ol’ chap will be able to select amongst, in addition to the stock watch, two fashionable, yet functional, watches whilst infiltrating enemy territories and making a muck of things abroad.

The “Dead Ringer” Spy Watch gives our sneakster the ability to “feign” death, via what we can only assume as some crazy type of holographic image of his corpse projected from the watch, the instant he is injured by the enemy. The concept here is that while the watch is enabled, if our trickster is shot, the enemy sees his corpse fall, yet he isn’t really dead. So, basically, anyone foolish enough to otherwise gloat (or tea-bag) his corpse will soon be joining the act, only their face down position will not be quite so holographic. However, if our ski mask toting stealth honcho is actually dealt a killing blow by the enemy, well, then the ruse isn’t really a ruse, now is it?

The “Cloak and Dagger” Spy Watch operates just like the stock watch spies have been using all along, only it does not drain energy while standing still, cloak enabled. You still burn like a witch on a pyre though. Pyros take note.

I’ve taken liberty of transcribing from the catalog image (shown below) as Valve’s own words regarding the watch upgrades:

The “Dead Ringer” Spy Watch

You’ve made all the right moves – conducted weeks of reconnaissance, stolen the blueprints to the safe, scaled the sheer mountain wall and penetrated deep into the heart of your enemy’s fortress in disguise. Then some mouth-breathing guard shoots you in the leg and beats you to death with your own ski mask.

No more! The moment you receive a non-lethal hit, the Dead Ringer cloaks the REAL you for up to EIGHT SECOND while creating a realistic simulacrum of your grisly and limp corpse. By the time your adversary races toward your “body” to frisk you for cash and pull gold fillings out of your mouth, you’ll already be behind him, poised for the killing blow.

The “Cloak And Dagger” Spy Watch

All historians agree that George Washington’s greatest regret was not being PERMANENTLY INVISIBLE. Now you can succeed where the man who invented America failed. Be invisible forever with the Cloak and Dagger Spy Watch!

“Liar!” owners of our classic Cloak Device may be yelling. “When I’m invisible my power is constantly draining!” Not with Cloak and Dagger. So long as you stand still, your cloak will REGENERATE INDEFINITELY. Only movement drains its power.

But attention, fans of picking up metal objects: The Cloak and Dagger is ONLY powered by standing still.

I take back my statement about “a thousand spies screaming ‘bloody hell’”.

He who laughs last cannot laugh properly at all… because he’s entirely too busy enjoying a cigarette. Chuckling will have to do…

Hi! It’s Friday, and we’ve got another great product for you! Not only is Friday great because it’s the end of the work week, it’s also weekend deal time on Steam.

That’s right, for a limited time only, you can be treated to the latest Call of Duty title from Treyarch, World at War, for 50% off. Now, since I know that some of our readers struggle with math, that’s just $24.99. $24.99!

But wait, there’s more!

If you order within the next 2 days, we’ll throw in the recently released Map Pack 1 absolutely free! We’ll even waive processing and handling fees! So stop playing older Call of Duty games, and get your copy of World at War today! Here’s how to order!

Head over to Steam and grab your copy today!

I can hear a thousand spies screaming “bloody hell” right now…

Valve have updated the official Team Fortress 2 website and bestowed upon its lowly internet masses knowledge of the next upgrade (downgrade?) to the Sniper class for its eccentric, yet lovable, multiplayer first person shooter Team Fortress 2. From today’s update to the website, it looks like the ol’ Aussie is getting a Spy countermeasure of sorts. Valve explain best:

(Introducing) The Razorback

“The Razorback is a beautiful hand-carved tribal shield, built using indigenous techniques passed from father to son since before recorded time. Sometimes the old ways really are the best ways. And after using the Razorback in the field, we quickly discovered this was not one of those times.

All the tribal craftsmanship in the world, it turns out, cannot stop a modern butter knife. So we taped a car battery to it. Sure, the added weight of the redesigned Razorback’ll slow you down a little. But any poor sap dumb enough to backstab you while you’re sporting one is getting a surprise to the tune of 10,000 volts. Plus, if they want to stab you again, they’ll have to wait until their knife cools down. Which is lucky for you, since the Razorback collapses into a million finely crafted pieces after a single stab.”

Fragile or not, I hope whomever manufactured that thing didn’t skimp on the insulation material to protect the person wearing it. Ouch!

We’re just a few days away from gettin’ the goods, mate!

Valve have released more details regarding the upcoming update to the Sniper class for Team Fortress 2. The update now adds a new game mode ‘Payload Race’ as well as a new map ‘Pipeline’ to go along with it. Also revealed are two new Arena maps: Sawmill and Nucleus.

In case you missed it, Day 1 of the Sniper Update was covered here.

More details and screens of the upcoming Sniper Update after the break.

The new game mode ‘Payload Race’ is Payload mode with a new twist. Described by Valve as “gladiatorial cart combat”, instead of one team pushing a mine cart to a finish line while the other defends, both teams simultaneously will push their individual cart to a finish line. Something tells me this will play out akin to two opposing battleships passing in the night at a 100 meters – itchy trigger fingers not withstanding.

The first map for Payload Race titled ‘Pipeline’ is conveniently described by our beloved camper himself in a postcard to his mum:

“Dear Mum,

Life is great as a killer assassin professional. Been busy lately trying to destroy a pipeline. Remember when I told you about that payload mission? It’s like that, except both sides are trying to deliver their payloads at once. It’s been crazy trying to push the cart into enemy territory AND stop their cart from getting into ours. It was an uphill battle by the end – literally! Stop pushing for a sec and it rolls back down to the bottom. Hard work, but it keeps me busy. Love to you and Dad.

PS – Tell him I make more money than a doctor.

PPS – Actually, just tell him I AM a doctor now.”

The two new Arena maps are best described by Valve:

Sawmill

“Set in a stormy mountain sawmill, this arena map has its cap point in a large structure atop a hill in the center of the map; beneath which lies a hidden underground spytech base; and above which, pouring down on everything we just mentioned, is rain—the first weather effect to appear in a TF map. If that previous sentence wasn’t long enough for you, replace the period with a comma and add this next part: players must ALSO watch out for the two deadly saw blades near the cap, which were left on when the previous occupants abandoned it for a less deadly, hilly, rain-swamped sawmill not built on a spybase.”

Nucleus

“A diabolical doomsday device is the foundation of this circular arena map, which features long sightlines and a bottomless radioactive pit underneath most of the game area. The cap, located in the center of the arena, is only accessible by catwalks suspended over a chasm, which open after the timer has run down.”

TF2 fans can expect the update to go live very soon.

Tripwire entertainment is psyched as Killing Floor prepares for launch as Steam’s top seller. The co-operative survival horror game challenges players to hunt down experiments gone bad in the mean streets of London. You can recruit up to five of your buddies to stand with you or go solo offline. Gameplay features include a Persistent perk system and “ZEDtime ” slomo so you can appreciate a spectacularly chunky death, even in multiplayer.

Killing Floor is still 25% off as a pre-order discount for a few more hours before it goes live May 14th on Steam. More details on game features follow the break courtesy of FileFront.

• Co-op game mode for up to six players obliterating multiple waves of specimens.

• Solo game mode for offline play.

• Watch those crucial and violent creature deaths in slomo “ZEDtime”, even in multiplayer.

• 9 different monster types trying to eat your face off, armed with everything from teeth and claws, through to chainsaws, chainguns and rocket-launchers.

• 12+ weapons for the players to chose from, ranging from knives and fire-axes up to pump shotguns, rifles and a flamethrower.

• Add in a welder, medical tools and body armor to help the players survive.

• Persistent Perks system, allowing players to convert their in-game achievements into permanent improvements to their character’s skills and abilities.

• Players choose which Perks to play with, so they can best balance out a co-op team to survive the horrors.

• Open, non-linear play areas: choose when and where to fight – or run; weld doors closed to try and direct the monster horde.

• Full support for Steamworks features, including Steam Achievements and Friends.

• Fully-configurable, allowing players to change things as simple as the difficulty level or number of creature waves, or go so far as to set up their own favorite waves of monsters.

• Includes SDK for the creation of new levels and mods.